Postpartum Checklist: Top 5 Mental Health Areas

There are many things to consider and prepare when expecting a baby: nursery, essentials for the baby, preparing your body, putting together your birth plan, hiring a doula, etc. Among these important aspects, it’s also important to prepare your mental health for postpartum. However, this is an aspect that can get overlooked and lacks access to (or knowledge of) helpful resources. I am here to help remove that barrier and provide you with the top 5 areas of mental health that’s important to prep during pregnancy to assist with making you feel more prepared for postpartum which, in turn, will help it feel more manageable.

***This checklist is fairly extensive. Please pace yourself and take breaks as needed. If you’d like guidance in fulfilling this checklist, I’d love to connect with you to discuss how I can assist you in this process. Click below to schedule your FREE 15 minute phone consultation.

Postpartum Mental Health Checklist: INternal Components

Preparing for all the different aspects of postpartum can feel overwhelming; especially when we’re not entirely sure how to prepare certain aspects (or what aspects to prepare). Below, you’ll find the top 5 areas of mental health broken into two categories: internal and external. We will first start with exploring the 2 internal components which refer to the foundational aspects that will take place within the home; establishing a strong foundation so you and your partner can function effectively within your new circumstances.

1. Essential Needs‍

   1. Sleep - sleep is a non-negotiable for both parents and is one of the most challenging needs to get met within postpartum. Explore and integrate the items below to ensure you’re advocating for and encouraging quality sleep.

      • Identify obstacles to obtaining adequate rest and strategies to help address (and possibly overcome) those obstacles

      • Set your environment up for sleep success - consider elements such as comfort measures, temperature and noise, and location.

      • Establish shifts for which parent is going to be with your newborn and when. Exploring and identifying how many hours of sleep you’d ideally like to get in a stretch can be a good guide for establishing shifts.

   2. Meals - determine and integrate your meal plan for the first few weeks at home. Explore all options: frozen meal prep, daily meal prep, meal train, and take out. Some things to consider when determining your meal plan:

      • Nourishment - regardless of your plan, be sure to you are prioritizing nourishing meals while throwing in a few favorites/comfort foods

      • Organization - if you’re choosing a meal train, who’s going to be the organizer?

      • If you’re going the takeout route, you may consider collecting take out menus from your favorite restaurants ahead of time and placing them in a quick accessible spot within the home

   3. Self-Care - this is an area that can feel next to impossible to prioritize and its a necessity in the postpartum period. Here are a few questions to explore to assist you in implementing a self-care regimen

      1. Self-care frequency - how often would you ideally like to engage in self-care? From there, what’s a realistic frequency?

      2. Self-care necessity - how will you know when you’re needing self-care?

      3. Self-care ideas - what are ways you can practice self-care?

      4. Comfort measures - what items provide you with comfort (both mental/emotional and physical)?

      5. Partner support - how can your partner support you in prioritizing self-care? Are there ways your partner can help you feel recharged?

   4. Household Needs - maintaining the household will look different when adjusting to parenthood and learning your baby. Follow these 3 steps to create a guide for managing household chores/needs:

      • Step 1: Create Chores List - create a list of all the typical and necessary chores that need to continue to get done

      • Step 2: Categorize Your List - categorize items in one of the following areas, essential (E), preferable (P), and forgettable (F)

      • Step 3: Assign List Tasks - identify who’s going to do which of the items on the list. Keep in mind, rest and nest is your priority during this time; outsource if you have to and if your circumstances allow.

2. Conversations To Have With Your Spouse - postpartum and adjusting to and learning a new baby can take a toll on the relationship of the parents. Having conversations addressing the important topics below beforehand will help you and your partner feel more connected and help you to continue functioning as a partnership. If you’re unsure how to start these conversations with your partner and/or would like guidance in these conversations, I’d love to connect with you over a FREE consultation call and provide you with an idea of how I can assist you and your partner in having effective conversation in the above areas.

   1. Mom/Birthing Parent Needs

      1. Expectations - What do you expect from your partner while you’re recovering?

      2. Baby blues vs. postpartum depression - Do you understand the difference between baby blues and postpartum depression? Do you know when, in postpartum, to seek mental professional help? For more information on postpartum mental health disorders, read Perinatal Mental Health Disorders

      3. Advocate - how will you advocate for your needs during this period? How can your partner assist you in this process?

   2. Dad/Non-Birthing Parent Needs

      1. Integration & inclusion - How will you advocate for being integrated and involved in the postpartum period and newborn phase? (Fathers/non-birthing parents from a research study done in 2022 reported feeling like a “spare part” (Schobinger, Vanetti, Ramelet, Horsch 2022) during this period.)

      2. Postpartum/hospital stay questions - Do you have any questions about the postpartum/hospital stay that will help you feel more prepared?

      3. Advocate - how will you advocate for your mental and emotional needs during this period? How can your partner assist you in this process?

   3. Relationship Needs

      1. Therapy - are you willing to engage in marriage/couples counseling if needed?

         1. How will you know if you need professional help within the marriage/relationship?

      2. Pre-baby adjustments - what are you each willing to adjust from your pre-baby life to make more time for your child and family?

      3. Partner prioritization - how will you and your partner prioritize each other within parenthood?

         1. What are your daily practices?

         2. What are your weekly and monthly practices?

      4. Individual time - how will you both get time for yourselves outside of parenthood?

         1. Identify and communicate to one another what you both really need to take care of yourselves. Refer back to self-care under essential needs section.

      5. Physical connection - how will you stay physically connected if you’re not ready for sex?

      6. Emotional connection - how will you stay emotionally connected to one another?

Postpartum Mental Health Checklist: External Components

‍The external components of your mental health checklist address the top 3 factors that will either take place outside of your home and/or external factors that will be coming into your home during postpartum.

1. Support System Structure - it’s important to know who’s in your village. Knowing who your safe and trusted support people are and how to utilize them helps reduce the likelihood of isolation throughout postpartum.

   1. Who are your safe support people? These are individuals who you can be fully transparent with about your experience without the worry of judgment or providing unsolicited advice.

   2. Who are your action oriented people? These are individuals you can call to hold/watch your baby while you take care of you within the home.

   3. Who are your nourishing people? These are individuals you trust to provide nourishing foods/recipes, who have access or knowledge around professional resources, and/or who offer distracts that help you feel mentally and emotionally nourished.

2. Visitors - everyone will be excited to see you and meet the new baby however, this excitement can feel very overwhelming. Explore the questions below to set expectations and begin creating boundaries for visitors.

   1. Visitor timeline - how soon after you give birth will you want visitors?

      • If you are delivering in a hospital or outside of the home, do you want visitors in your recovery room? If so, who?

      • When you invite visitors over, how long do you want them to stay?

   2. Prioritizing visitors - who are you prioritizing in the earlier visiting days?

      • You can break it down into days, weeks, and months after your birth.

3. Mental Health Appointments - research has shown mental health care needs aren’t typically identified until 8 weeks postpartum; making birthing people just as vulnerable to mental health battles at 8+ weeks postpartum as they are days after birth. It’s encouraged to continue postpartum care for up to a year following birth to ensure mental health care is accessible (Allen, E.C., Grobamn, W.A., Miller, E.S., Nugooru, A., & Sakowicz, A. 2002). In support of this research, I’ve provided you with a few actionable steps to put into play before baby arrives.

   1. Be informed and prepared - in the event of needing mental professional help, where/who are you going to contact? Do you want to attend the session(s) alone or together?

      • Ask your medical provider if they are mental health care (i.e. therapist) referrals

      • Utilize the top therapist search engines (such as Psychology Today) or Google to find a local mental health therapist

   2. Remove scheduling stress - schedule your postpartum therapy appointments, both individual and joint (i.e. marriage/couples therapy) sessions, before baby arrives. Similar to your 6 week medical follow up, you will attend these after baby has arrived. Even if you don’t think you’ll need them, schedule them anyway! As referenced in research above, check ups on your mental health are just as important as your physical check ups.

   3. Check in systems - discuss and integrate a check in system on how each of you are managing your mental health during this postpartum period.

      • How often are you checking in on one another during this period?

Reminders

As I mentioned earlier in this blog, going through and addressing these top 5 postpartum mental health areas can be overwhelming. Here are a few reminders for you as you work towards checking off and integrating these aspects:

• Allow flexibility - what you establish today may not be necessary or make sense once baby is here so we want the plan to be flexible; allowing you and your partner to adjust as needed. It may be worthwhile to create a plan B so you’re not scrambling to find alternatives if your first option(s) don’t fit your circumstance.

• There are no right answers! How you complete this checklist is all dependent on what works best for you, your partner, and your baby.

• Take it in stride - you don’t have to have all the answers right away. Give you and your partner time to think through these areas

If you are wanting guidance in completing your checklist and increasing its maximum benefit, let’s connect! Click below to schedule your FREE 15 minute phone consultation with me to learn how we will walk through this checklist together; leaving you feeling as prepared as possible to manage your mental health while recovering from birth and adapting to parenthood.

Here’s to living a better life as your best self.

Brittany Squillace, MA, LMFT

Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist

References

Johnson, K. A. (2017). The fourth trimester: A postpartum guide to healing your body, balancing your emoitons, and restoring your vitality. Shambhala.

Vieira, B. (2023). Enough about the baby: A brutally honest guide to surviving the first year of motherhood. Union Square & Co.

Sakowicz A, Allen E, Nugooru A, et al. Timing of perinatal mental health needs: Data to inform policy. Am J Obstetrics Gynecologist MFM 2022. DOI: 10.1016/j.ajogmf.2022.100482

Schobinger E, Vanetti M, Ramelet A-S and Horsch A (2022). Social support needs of first-time parents in the early-postpartum period: A qualitative study. Front. Psychiatry 13:1043990. doi: 10.3389/fpsyt.2022.1043990